Saturday, January 16, 2010

Frustrated!!!!

I'm struggling so hard to get back on track.  I am in tears as I share this blog with you.  I have regained all my lost weight.  I'm so angry with myself.  I'm feeling the hopelessness of what my future holds because of my addiction.  I'm scared that I will be fat and unhealthy till the day I die.  I fear that my life will be cut short due to my addiction.  I usually don't want to quit trying...but today the thought has entered my mind.  I feel beat.  However, with a dedication to better my life, I will keep pushing forward.  I ask for strong prayers!!!

Monday, January 11, 2010

Monday, January 11th, 2010

I started today of with a great workout.  I walked 3 miles...to a dvd.  It is way to cold to do it outside :).  I also did my sit-ups.  I am so glad that I woke up at 5:00 am to accomplish this because all last week I wasn't able to get my workout during the day.  By night, I'm too exhausted from the day's activities to do any workout.  Therefore my best time is early morning.

I fell great for starting my day off in such an energetic way.  Now the key is to continue.  So as not to get bored, Amy has set my workout to be different each day.  I love that!! 

Now my real struggle is the food.  I decided to start my day off with either hard boiled eggs, bacon and grapefruit or oatmeal with raisins.  I will alternate this because these are my 2 favorite breakfasts.  For lunch I plan on having a chicken breast, leftover cheesy potatoes, carrots and an apple.  For dinner, I am making white bean/chicken soup for myself.  This will be a staple lunch or dinner when the rest of the family is eating  a higher calorie dinner.  It is low calories/fat and really fills you up.  I will add the recipe in my main page.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Day One

Not off to a great start.  I want to wake up by 5am to get my workout in, but it is difficult to talk myself in to it. I will be doing my workout during nap time now.  30 minutes of continuous motion---walking video, 50 sit-ups and 8 push ups.  My friend Amy has planned my workouts but I failed to do them for the past few weeks so it is like starting all over :(

Today, like most others, is a day filled with food cravings.  I need to beat them, but I find it almost impossible.  How do smokers quit smoking, alcholics quit drinking and drug addicts beat the need for drugs?  This is how I feel.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

This One is For You, Matt...and All My Other Faithful Friends

I'm embarrassed to say that I let the holidays get the best of me. I let my guard down and I enjoyed anything and everything....and way too much of it too. My clothes are too tight once again and I'm feeling so sluggish. My brother, for the last month, has encouraged me to get back on track. I, however, was enjoying (until now) being "bad". Again, my friends, eating in itself is not bad. The way I live is. Put it this way; would you take your alcoholic friend who is in recovery to bar and buy him a drink? NO!! This would set him back in his recovery process. I don't know when or how to say "when". It is frustrating, discouraging and debilitating to say the least.
So, as once again, I try to get on the wagon, I ask for your prayers of strength and endurance.

If you want to follow my weight loss, see the chart on the bottom left of my page.
I will be listing my goals and rewards for reaching those goals in my next post. I will also be adding what I ate and workouts I completed each day as to be more accountable.
Happy New Year and God Bless All Of You!!!


Monday, December 7, 2009

Rough Couple of Weeks...This Post is Dedicated to Tammy!

Well...I'm back once again!!!  All I can say is that I'm not going to quit!!! 

That is why this post is dedicated to Tammy.  She has been knocked down big time...but I know she is strong and will not give up.

Thanksgiving Day stated off great with my Turkey Trot in Detroit.  I had so much fun, especially doing it with my dear friend, Corenae.  I ate very conservatively and was so proud of myself.  Then, the bad news came and the weekend was very hard and thus I emotionally ate.  Once I started the spiral downward on my eating, I didn't turn it around....until today.  I'm ready to get back on track. 

I'm ready to start feeling better, stronger, sexier ;).  When I am eating junk, drinking pop and over eating, I feel run down and just plain YUCKY. 

Thank you to all my friends out there that have encouraged me to update my posts.  You are the ones that will keep me accountable and I need that.

I pray that as everyone prepares for this Wonderful Christmas, you remember the Reason for the Season.  Praise our Lord and Savior and live as He would want you to...that is my focus.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Long Time

I'm so sorry!!!   I haven't fell off the wagon.  I haven't stopped my challenge.  I just haven't made the time to get on here and post.  However, I do find by not committing to my posting, I'm not remaining constant on my weight loss dedication.  Therefore, I am making an early New Years resolution to post daily...even if it is something silly :).  Please keep the encouragements and ideas coming! 

My weight loss hasn't been all what I want it, but like I said, I haven't been super committed either.  The up side to this is that it has been losses...so losses and not gains are good. 

I'm very excited because in 3 more days I will be doing the Turkey Trot in Detroit with Corenae...something 2 years ago neither one of us would have attempted or wanted to attempt :).  I'm more excited about this than the turkey dinner on Thanksgiving....GREAT SIGN!!! 

Speaking of Thanksgiving...would you each please share with me one or two things that you are thankful for.  I will start.  I'm thankful for so many things but this year, especially, I want to give thanks for our soldiers who fight for our safety, freedom and rights.  God Bless all of you!!!

Monday, November 9, 2009

Fell Off the Wagon, Finished My First 5K, Never Giving Up

Oh my!  Dear friends and family,  I severely fell off the wagon.  I lost focus and therefore gave in to every little temptation.  I was to the point where I wasn't craving things like pop or candy...but now I am again.  The good news about falling is that you can get back up again...some of us slower than others...but it can be done.  Happily, I'm up again!

One of the reasons I started giving in to the cravings and desires is that I was training for the 5K. I told myself lies.  "Oh, you are working out so hard that a little more calories won't hurt".  The problem isn't the couple of more calories.  It is the MANY more calories.  I stopped tracking and wasn't sure how much I was really taking in.  Well, the scale doesn't lie.  I took in enough extra calories to go back up to 254 again. 

That is okay...because lesson learned!!!!  The good news is that 'I'M NEVER GIVING UP'.  As my friend Amy says...Direction not Perfection!!!! 

I will be adding pictures from my first 5K.  I finished second to last...but I finished!!!  My bestest bud, Corenae and I are doing the 5K Stuffing Strut in Detroit on Thanksgiving morning.  I'm so excited to be doing this with her...something neither of us could ever see ourselves doing 2 years ago.  Lesson here....NEVER SAY NEVER :)

God Bless,
Becky